Tuesday's Fortune: 18 December 2012

MEAL:  1 order (8) Crab Rangoon + 1 small order Sweet & Sour Chicken = $8.45 + $1.55 tip

Hotcha!  Hank

Something 4 Sandy Hook

Japandroids:  Celebration Rock:  "The House That Heaven Built"  [mp3]

After the shit that went down in Connecticut this morning, I found myself sitting at my desk playing all of the loudest, most anthemic and energizing music I could find on my hard drive.  Music to combat the deep sadness, music to express the frustrated anger in the wake of another senseless atrocity.  Music to fight the tears.

(Gun control, video games, the mental health system, our economy, etcetera etcetera...)

I'm simply not interested in the same dull round of talking heads making the same tired points about the same old causes of murder.  I don't particularly give a shit about what Reddit has to say, just like you could give a fuck about what I'm about to say...

Twenty little kids killed this morning, among others, and you know as well as I do that this won't be the last time.  And even though today's tragedy feels like the worst one yet, you know as well as I do that it won't feel like the worst forever, because every new one is the worst one yet.  And you know you'll cry again at your desk at work, and you just hope no one notices because it wrongly feels wrong to cry at fucking work at your fucking desk, but goddammit, the shit just keeps going down and there is no other answer except that some people are simply fucked in the head, but that's no fucking answer, is it?

So right now I just want to dance and sing and bang my fists on the coffee table and I dunno, celebrate the fact that I'm alive and singing and banging my fists on the fucking coffee table.

I hope there were some small mercies in that school this morning.  I hope we all are shown a little mercy when our time comes.  Sadly, I think that's the best we can hope for.

Hank

Tuesday's Fortune: 11 December 2012

MEAL:  2 Vegetable Spring Rolls + 1 small order Chicken & Pea Pods = $6.95 + $1.05 tip

Hotcha!  Hank

Something 4 The Weekend # 255

Tom Zé:  Estudando a Bossa (Nordeste Plaza):  "Roquenrol Bim-Bom"  [mp3]

Tom Zé is one of my absolute favorites, but because he is Brazilian and sings in Portuguese, I don't understand a single word.  I think my love, despite the language barrier, is a testament to the musicality of his singing, and the strength of the songs themselves - endlessly inventive, exciting, even joyous.

A strange man from an alien culture, making often weird and sophisticated music, with plenty of nods and winks (Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da).  For more than forty years.  For me, he's the Brazilian Zappa, and that's about the highest praise I can offer.

Hotcha!  Hank

Tuesday's Fortune: 04 December 2012

MEAL:  3 Roast Pork Egg Rolls + 3 Vegetable Spring Rolls = $6.90 + $1.10 tip

Hotcha!  Hank

Something 4 The Weekend # 254

Long Fin Killie:  Valentino:  "Matador"  [mp3]

Cows are slow, dumb animals, except that they can run as fast (or faster) than the average human, and when part of a herd, exhibit that so-called "herd mentality" that is frankly, quite chilling.

I lived for a year in Helenville, a very small, unincorporated farming town in south-central Wisconsin.  Our only neighbors, really, were Jerry and Sheri Vanderpoel, who owned the farm next to us, about a half-mile up the road.  They were an older couple, in their sixties, who's children had long ago flew the coop (literally!), and so because of age and circumstance, the Vanderpoels had thinned their herd of Holsteins to about fifty head, and even then, good ol' Jerry had a hard time managing them, because in the year I lived there, I probably had to help corral escaped cows about six or seven times.

In doing so, I ultimately found myself sunk several inches deep into the aromatic muck of the cow pen next to the barn, surrounded by fifty cows, several of which would inevitably start circling me, like seemingly slow, dumb sharks, or a street gang looking for cash and jewelry.

Here are the two things I learned the hard way about handling cows - first - you gotta let 'em know you're the boss, because cattle herds always have a pecking order, and if they sense weakness in you, they'll think you're just another cow (a small, weak, insignificant cow at that), and so they have no reservations about messing with you, muscling and bullying you around.  Imagine three or five or seven cows doing this simultaneously, me getting jostled and knocked around in the muck by these big beasts in close quarters.

Secondly, I learned that you gotta keep talking to the cows so that they know where you are.  Even though cows have eyes on the sides of their heads, their periphery vision isn't all that great, and they get easily agitated and startled unless you're directly in front of them.  When agitated, well, they jostle and nudge even more than usual, and when startled, they'll buck and kick.

In other words, when dealing with cattle, speak softly and carry a big stick. 

Be non-aggressive, be gentle and friendly and re-assuring in your speech and touch, try looking the cow straight in the eye whenever possible, but have that big stick around to defend yourself because they can, and will, mess you up.

Hotcha!  Hank