15 April 2008

Covering Covers # 4


The New England region of North America was originally settled by Puritan immigrants from Britain who were not happy with leadership within The Church Of England. History teaches us about the pilgrims landing at Plymouth Rock, as well as the founding of the Massachusetts Bay Colony in the area that later became Boston, both groups being part of the "Great Migration" of Puritans in the first half of the 1600's.

These devoutly religious groups helped shape the nation that would become the United States Of America, and even now, 232 years after declaring our independence from Great Britain, one can argue that not only is their influence still felt throughout this nation, but that their religious beliefs and practices are woven so deep into the fabric of America that it cannot be undone.

In other words, we are a Christian nation, shaped and founded upon Christian values and ideas, and no amount of bitching by secularists can undo the fact that Christianity still informs and colors nearly all corners of American life today.

And yet...

And yet, there are many aspects of American life that do not reflect this Christian underpinning.
  • The divorce rate hovers around 50%.
  • We gamble like crazy. Often in church basements. BINGO!
  • We consume pornography with an almost insatiable passion.
  • We often take the goddamn Lord's name in vain.
  • About half of all married adults will commit adultery at some point in their marriage.
  • America's murder rate is among the highest in the civilized world.
  • Excessive alcohol and drug consumption is fairly widespread.
  • As a nation, we lie, cheat and steal with the best of them.

My point is - most of us break multiple commandments on any given day, to say nothing of the 7 deadly sins, and then we go to church on Sunday, believing our Christian God will absolve us of all our transgressions from the previous week. Hell, plenty of us believe we only need faith in God to get to heaven - that we don't even have to go to Church, or lead moral lives - to find redemption. I mean, some of the most wicked, vile human beings I know are self-professed "devout Christians".

So, what does this rambling preamble of mine have to do with The Black Crowes' amorica. album cover? I think it should be fairly obvious.

Here we have a bikini bottom with an American flag design. The American flag, a rich symbol of this nation and what it purportedly stands for. A representation of all that is good and holy and righteous here in the USA. God bless the USA!!!!!

But what's that? A tuft of pubic hair sticking out from behind the stars and stripes? Oh my! What's that all about?

Simply put, that underneath the righteousness and purity of America, there exists a darker reality. A wild and wooly America that likes fucking and sucking as much as possible. And not just our spouses, but our neighbor's spouse, our teenaged babysitter, the cashier at the local supermarket, our favorite young celebrities, etc. And not just straight up missionary position coitus either - how about some deep-throated oral action? How about some good ol' anal? How about some dynamite group sex at a swinger party at a non-descript ranch-style house in a quiet suburban neighborhood?

Who hasn't fucked a stranger up against a dumpster behind the local dive bar at 2 am? Who hasn't masturbated up on their garage roof in the middle of the night, trying to re-create scenes from The Basketball Diaries? Who hasn't banged their 50 year old, recently divorced American Lit. teacher in the back of her Crown Vic?

Yeah, we've convinced ourselves (if not the rest of the world), that we're an honest, God-fearing nation, but the reality, of course, is that we're merely human, and while this sounds trite, humans are still animals when all is said and done, and animals loooooove to fuck.

Amore. America. Amorality.

amorica.

Hotcha! Hank

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